The Lunch of a Lifetime, Part Three

Ok, I’ve told you about the staff, the flowers, the setting – all sublime, but just maybe you’d like me to get to the food and wine. Bear in mind though, the whole mis en scene they create at French Laundry unfolds slowly and deliberately, and one is meant to savor each aspect like, well, the French themselves do. All senses are engaged, and that includes the sense of patience - the lack of which for once did not get the better of me. F.L. is not the place if you have an hour to eat and get out.

Our server was (I kid you not) a dead ringer for actress Charlize Theron. Fresh-scrubbed and beautiful, with a psychology degree she “uses daily (!).” She welcomed us with champagne (the perfect start to any celebration!) and the menu. Choosing is pretty simple. The Chef’s Tasting Menu consists of nine courses, and there is a vegetable-only option. Michael and I both elected to do the carnivore tour, though everything on the vegetable tasting sounded divine too, even if I didn’t know what a “pickled ramp bulb” was. I was told that the menu changes daily, though certain signature dishes will reappear. (As if I needed a reason to return.)

The sommelier was summoned to advise us on wine choices. He was, let’s just say, devoutly French, brisk and professional. If I had briefly entertained the notion of looking into the possibility of Red House apparel for the staff I quickly changed my mind when I saw the sommelier, whose “costume” appeared to be couture. Perhaps hand-sewn by Karl Lagerfeld himself. Whoa. We also deferred to this elegant man’s vast and global knowledge of wines and selected the pairing menu. Interestingly, there was not a Napa wine amongst the nine featured, though there was representation from Sonoma, Santa Cruz and Santa Ynez - appellations I have almost no familiarity with. And this is good! The day was about stepping out of the box and giving ourselves over to people who can teach us something, while of course, enjoying the extraordinary outcome of their education.

Now you might think nine courses is a King Henry VIII kind of meal. You would be wrong. “Tasting,” means just that. And did we each drink nine different glasses of wine in the middle of the day? Mais non! More like 1/3 glass per course. Some were so delectable that more - a lot more - would have been nice to savor. Maybe out in the garden after lunch? Alas, they think three hours is plenty of “experience” and do not currently offer a “lingering lunch plan” for would-be hangers-on like me.

Now pay attention - if you read nothing else today, or maybe all week: here is a morsel of knowledge I found to be worth the price of admission: I now know a wine that can be successfully paired with asparagus! Until now, I thought this an impossibility, but the proof is in the pudding: Our Salad of White Asparagus and Brooks Cherries was expertly paired with an Austrian wine (write this down:) Schloss Gobelsburg, Gruner Veltliner, “Steinsetz,” Kamptal. I have already sourced this from a distributor, expecting it to cost a fortune, but was pleasantly surprised and so ordered a case for asparagus season. I plan to impress at dinner parties alllll summer. Not with that salad though.

Next time, I will conclude this very long and fabulous experience. Hint: we end up in the kitchen! Was the credit card refused? You’ll have to wait and see.